Moisture is the essence of wetness and wetness is the essence of beauty.
So, I'm rappelling down Mount Vesuvius when suddenly I slip and I start to fall. Just falling...ahh...ahh. I'll never forget the terror! When suddenly I realize: "Holy shit, Hansel, haven't you been smoking peyote for six straight days and couldn't some of this maybe be in your head?" And it was. I was totally fine. I've never even been to Mount Vesuvius.
So join now, 'cause at the Derek Zoolander Center For Kids Who Can't Read Good and Wanna Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too, we teach you that there's more to life than just being really, really, really good looking. Right, kids?
Oh, you hate to see something like that at an event like this: ugly protesters bothering beautiful people.
Let me show you Derelicte. It is a fashion, a way of life inspired by the very homeless, the vagrants, the crack-whores that make this wonderful city so unique.
I wasn't like every other kid, you know, who dreams about being an astronaut. I was always more interested in what bark was made out of on a tree. Richard Gere's a real hero of mine. Sting. Sting would be another person who's a hero. The music he's created over the years...I don't really listen to it, but the fact that he's making it, I respect that. I care desperately about what I do. Do I know what product I'm selling? No. Do I know what I'm doing today? No. But I'm here and I'm gonna give it my best shot.
Do you understand that the world does not revolve around you and your "do whatever it takes, ruin as many people's lives, so long as you can make a name for yourself as an investigatory journalist, no matter how many friends you lose or people you leave dead and bloodied along the way, just so long... so you can make a name for yourself as an investigatory journalist, no matter how many friends you lose or people you leave dead and bloodied and dying along the way"?
If there is anything that this horrible tragedy can teach us, it's that a male model's life is a precious, precious commodity. Just because we have chiseled abs and stunning features, it doesn't mean that we too can't not die in a freak gasoline fight accident.
You want an opinion? With a push-up bra you could have a nice rack of lamb up there.
Words can only hurt you if you try to read them. Don't play their game!